Impact

How do you measure the impact you have had on a place and community? Have you made a difference? Caused someone to see the world in a new way? Will you be missed?...really, how do you measure that? Sometimes I feel like people expect to hear that you've done something really amazing or wonderful - that you've made a huge impact on the place you have served in...when the truth for me is it's not really like that. I've spent my days at church and in the school but I haven't done anything extraordinary - nothing that I wouldn't have done at home with the same opportunities, but I think that is okay. I have to say some of my favorite things this year are the random hugs children surprise me with, getting them to giggle about silly things, teaching some of them that art doesn't have to be a masterpiece to be fun or that messing up doesn't mean something is ruined, getting them to realize that adults don't know everything, watching students triumph over old problems (you know... that light bulb moment), and learning about the lives of my friends (the teachers I work with). None of these things are extraordinary - quite the opposite in fact. These are everyday moments. The thing about everyday moments though is that they can change how someone views a day, week or year. In all reality my students will probably only remember me as that American teacher they had when they were little - they won't think 'wow, that woman changed my life' or 'without her I wouldn't be where I am today'...but they probably will remember that year 6 was fun. They went on neat trips, learned lots of things and had nice teachers. I haven't changed their worlds but it is enough for me that they will look back on this year positively...I got to help them have fun.

So how do you measure the impact you have had on a place and community? I'm choosing to measure it by the little girl  I helped to finally understand multiplying by 10, the little boy who always tells me he is going to visit Ohio, the children who know me by name and say hello that I've never met, and the sounds the children make when they realize I will be leaving before the year is through....that is impact enough for me.

Congratulations Graduate!

WOW!!! I can't believe you are graduating. I can still remember rocking you when you were a little baby, carrying you to bed while Dad carried Bri and Mom carried Corey, Bri and I teaching you to ride your bike, giving you piggyback rides when your little legs were too tired to walk another foot, braiding your hair, watching plays, cheering you on at soccer games, taking you places when I first got my license and watching you drive away for the first time when you got yours. Growing up with someone is such a joy because you get to be such a fundamental part of their life...and they of yours. Being sisters makes that even more special. You have become such an amazing person and I am so proud of you! I'm sorry I'm not there to celebrate this milestone with you - I am cheering you on from the UK. I love you! Congratulations on your graduation, Carley!

The wedding I never thought I would miss...

To one of my best friends -

Congratulations on your big day! I don't have to be there to know that you are beautiful and your wedding is spectacular. Though I'm missing the walk down the aisle, the vows, and the cake...know that I have thought of you often. And not just today...I have thought of this day many times since the first time I realized I was going to miss it. I've never quite figured out how to feel about it all - whether I was sad for missing it or overjoyed because my best friend found someone to spend her life with. Today I settled on overjoyed...there is some sadness that I can't be there to share this day with you, but it is far outweighed by excitement and delight...all for you my friend! So know that today, even though I am not there with you...I am thinking of you. I love you!

Congratulations Renee and Tim!

Week at a Glance

Alright...so it's more like 8 or 9 days, but you get the picture. I just wanted you to see what kinds of things go on in a week(ish) for me in England. It's hard to say what it is exactly that I do because besides the basics (school, church, clubs) it's always changing a bit. I thought seeing it might be more helpful than me trying to explain...enjoy! I sure do :)

Making "fruit" for our vine during our Sunday school lesson.

Bishop Nick came to St. Wilfrid's. We helped with tea and biscuits.

I assisted during a science lesson at school.

Kaihle and I listening intently to our guide at an old monastery ruin Angie and Malcolm took us to.

I oversaw a writing lesson during SAT's week.

I also got the opportunity to lead an art lesson for a relaxing afternoon after testing.

Playing a math game during a lesson with one of the little girls (I think she won).

My big project!!! - planning an art session to make Olympic torches -it was a success!

See?...definitely a success!

Practicing with the kids for their musical - the songs are quite catchy.

In charge of another group of students for math during SAT's.

And these pictures still don't include everything.....I haven't included pictures from when we play games with a group of elderly (but definitely still feisty) Methodist on Thursdays, youth group on Friday night, Compline on Wednesdays, Thursday supper with the Anglicans, choir on Monday with a group of Methodist woman (our singing raises money :) ), the occasional after school project or field trip I tag along on for my school or the other odds and ends either church asks us to help with. We do quite a lot here in Bradford both as part of service and fellowship. It is all stuff I am really going to miss when I come home. Luckily, I live in a wonderful town and church community where I can continue many of these things, just in different ways.

Communicating With Art

"Maybe I'm an idealist, but I really do believe art transcends all boundaries. Language, culture, wealth, race, or gender have no bearing on one's ability and insight. Art just is. It is a language of its own that fosters a different kind of communication. This is a language I can speak. This is a language God gave me. This is a language I hope to share..."

My most recent project....drawing an image of heaven I've had in my head for awhile:

2 Months Left

Today is May 9th....exactly 2 months before I will set foot on American soil again. It's not something I usually like thinking about, let alone talk about, but I think it is important for you all to understand what 2 months left feels like. 2 months is excitement to see my home and family, but dread of leaving my home and English family. It is anticipation of enjoying a Mennonite congregation and church service, but sadness for the congregations and service styles we will be leaving behind. Its relief for the things I understand including words, culture, government, and holidays, but wariness for how unusual those things will seem upon my return. It's being able to drive myself any place I want to go, but nerves that getting used to English driving will have slightly confused my instincts (like which way to look for traffic). It's good old American pizza just a phone call away, but no more wonderful, delivered curry in the curry capital of the UK. It's names I can pronounce and accents I can understand, but a loss for the diversity of the people and languages I have learned from.

It's just confusing in every way. Sometimes when I think of returning I can hardly wait. I want to see my family. I want to shop and decorate with my mom. I want to learn things about history and politics from my dad. I want to spend time with my siblings - laughing, fighting and all. I want to rearrange the things in my house so they make sense (ask my mom...she can explain that one to you). I want to see my friends...have campfires, watch movies and catch up. I want to hug my dog and pet my cats. I want to sit in a pew at church and sing from a hymnal with music in it. I want to drive uptown just because I can. There are so many things I am looking forward to...but other times I have absolutely no desire to return home at all. I love my friends in this country. They are funny, kind and loads of fun to hang out with. They make wonderful food, take us exploring, and teach us many strange and quirky things about Yorkshire. I enjoy the Anglican church and all the interesting things I have learned. I like playing games with the Methodists and singing in their choir. I love the idea that I am so close to so many old and amazing places. I like having flatmates who I can complain to, celebrate with, discuss absolutely everything and anything with, learn from and teach. I even love working in the school with my 11 year olds (not always so much when they are jumping off the walls...but it is definitely always an adventure).

Lately my feelings about all of this have begun to bounce around more...probably because our end here is looming in the not so distant future. I am definitely enjoying every moment I have...but its beginning to feel like there aren't enough moments. Anticipating going home is much different than the anticipation for coming here was. It's hard to explain....it's just confusing.

So, I thought I would do something a little different on this blog. I am talking about the future but I am going to go back to the past (confusing I know...it fits the theme here). In one of my first English blogs I made a list of all the things I had noticed or thought were strange. I am going to reflect on that list from my new vantage point in time...original blog can be found here:

http://www.daretoliveindreams.blogspot.co.uk/2011/09/oh-say-can-you-see.html

(Grey is the old list- black is my reflection)

-Stop lights turn 'amber' both before they turn red and green.

they still do....and I still think its weird but definitely convenient.
-You have to turn on outlets for them to work.

this isn't something I have to remember to do anymore...I just do it.
-I'm pretty sure every time we turn left I am always going to think we are all going to die until I realize that we are not actually crossing traffic.

I am very used to turning left now. My life no longer flashes before my eyes...that being said I'm pretty sure I'll feel the same way about turning right when I return home.
-British people are hilarious. When they say something funny I actually think it's funny (this is for my family who thinks I have a weird sense of humor...it's not actually that weird).

Still think they are funny...but not their TV shows or most movies (they've got nothing on American media)
-Fish and chips are........interesting.

I do not like fish and chips...but I keep trying it like I expect that to change
-Not all British people drink tea...some of them actually like coffee (gasp).

I think the whole tea thing is a conspiracy...I think they just started that whole deal so they could tax Americans. You think I'm kidding but you should see the amount of people in this country that drink coffee...that being said I have grown very fond of tea. If I had lived during the time of the Boston tea party I would have been one of those people yelling 'what are you doing!? Don't waste it!'
-Washing dishes by hand is actually kind of relaxing. You have to slow down which gives you lots of time to think. Also, 3 people make a surprising amount of dishes.

I don't mind washing dishes FROM TIME TO TIME....I really miss dishwashers
-Heating units here are just plain odd (as are the door locking mechanisms).

still odd...but lovely when they are right beside your bed warming up your covers...door locking mechanisms are no good...give me a plain old lock any day
-Rachel and Kaihle are not as amused by the products while grocery shopping as me.

This probably still holds true...except we did find a box of craft Mac and cheese the other day that made all 3 of us freak out...and it confused the employees because they didn't actually sell it in their store.
-Candy here is awesome!

Sooo true!!! I am sending myself a box of it before I leave here and filling every spare crevice of my suitcases with it....when that runs out I have no idea what I will do..maybe start calling in favors from my British friends?
-People use the kind of words you normally only find in period books or movies in everyday conversation. For example...the word fortnight pops up often.

you get used to it...and unconsciously begin to use these words in everyday conversation...you will have to excuse me when I return home if I say some odd things.
-Crossing the road is surprisingly difficult and requires concentration (especially if a roundabout is involved).

Not nearly as hard as it once was...unless a roundabout is involved...too many directions for cars to come from...confusing and dangerous
-I actually like a little tea with my milk and sugar...er I mean I like a little milk and sugar with my tea.

Love tea...I don't even add as much milk or sugar as I used to
-My vocabulary is increasing daily...which is good, otherwise I wouldn't have a clue what people are trying to say half the time.

Still true...just today someone asked me....well they asked me something...I had to have it explained
-If I don't speak I blend in quite well...unless I'm in my neighborhood. Then I'm in the minority with no hope of blending in.

yup.....nodding is always good...and imitating hello and thank you are always good as well
-Boys that honk or whistle to get your attention are both amusing and irritating. It's like junior high all over again.

boys that honk and whistle are obnoxious period....amusing is once or twice....obnoxious is every few vehicles and you thinking they will cause an accident if they don't turn around and watch the road.
-The Grocery store is on the top of probably the highest mountain in all of the UK.

correction...tallest mountain in all of Europe...especially when you are late.
-I will have very muscly calves after walking up said mountain.

true...very true
-Hurricane winds followed us here from the US and are now trying to knock us over and/or blow down the flat.

no more hurricane winds...no earthquakes...no tornado sirens...no lightening...no thunder...really nothing interesting from mother nature except the occasional random snow storm in April to break up the days of rain.
-Cars along the side of the street do not have to all park facing the same direction. It is also alright if they are on the sidewalk a good foot or so.

Convenient...but dangerous and very narrow places for walking
-You won't see vans unless they are for a taxi service....or trucks now that I think about it.

still true...though there are a lot of camper vans I've learned...these people are very into caravaning.
-I may be a little more OCD about organization that I thought considering I've already gone through the kitchen, a closet, the living room, the bathroom....which is silly since we will probably be moving soon.

Since we've moved I've done my best to keep my OCD away from shared spaces (mostly)...but my room is a whole different story. It has probably been in 10 or so different arrangements.
-Rachel and Kaihle are a lot of fun to live with. We are all similar and different in equal measure.

Still true...amazingly we have had very few disagreements and no fighting. These two are people I will always want to spend time with.
-I haven't quite been able to let go of Ohio time yet. I still find myself counting backwards to know what time it 'really' is (I got a watch with two faces. Hopefully, if it's just there and I'm not always doing the math I won't think about it as much...problem solved...maybe).

Never was able to let go...my computer stayed on Ohio time because it was convenient for knowing when to talk to people at home (I once accidentally called my parents at like 4 in the morning because I was using a school computer oops)...and when people often ask you what time it would be in your part of the world...well you just never really let it go.
-I am ridiculously excited to start making friends (ironic because I'm a bit of an introvert).

This was hard because we never really met a lot of people our own age so we didn't make a lot of friends to hang out with but we did become very good friends with one another...and the vicar and his wife...and our neighbors...and our walking guide and her husband...and the people in choir...and I actually have quite a few friends at school :)....so I guess that did work out
-I love the weather here....I love the clouds, the rain, the cool temperatures, the wind....I love it!

I actually do like rain a lot...and the many cloudy days...but I do miss thunder storms and days with sunshine...and fog now that I think about it. For all the water they don't really have fog that often. Poor, poor, school children.
-It's doubtful that I will be able to stop myself from buying some super cute rain boots...they are everywhere.

I did it!! whooooo no boots....but I couldn't stop myself from buying lots of charms for my bracelets from all the places I've been. I'll show you when I get home.
-The list of places I want to see keeps growing both because I hear about things or people keep saying 'oh, you must see this.'

It is never ending...just the other day someone said, 'now I know you are leaving soon but you really must see.......'
-It is really easy to find people willing to talk about soccer/football.

or take you to football matches....I've been to 3 or 4...I even got to watch Manchester play at Old Trafford.
-I miss my own pillow.

very much
-There are animals here I can play with then give back to their owners to take care of...hehe.

this now includes bunnies so fluffy you wonder how they can see
-I am impatient to learn what I can about the different denominations and religions in this area.

I feel like I know a lot more about this from living it than I ever would have from a book.
-People don't take leftovers home after meals and will look at you funny when you ask.

Prashads lets you...but everywhere else still looks at you funny. I miss left overs.
-I am looking forward to beginning our work here.

I love working here...I can't wait to come home and find a job.
-England makes me happy :)

England makes me happy :)

Team Retreat

Easter morning I found myself sitting in a very large, very old cathedral in an area of a city a poet once dubbed the Square of Miracles. As I sat there listening to the service, I couldn't help my eyes from wandering over the ornate carvings, beautifully painted frescoes, and intricate stained glass windows. The choir sang, the Archbishop sprinkled us with holy water and incensed smoke and the congregation chanted in reply. I got to experience Easter in an entirely new and incredible way. I really concentrated on what was being said...because it was Easter and that's what you do on Easter......it also could have been a little bit because of the language barrier since the archbishop gave his sermon in Italian. 'Italian?' you are probably asking yourself. Where on earth did she find a cathedral with Italian clergy...the obvious answer is the correct one. Team England decided to take our team Retreat over the school Easter Holiday to Italy which is how I found myself celebrating Easter in Italian. As far as retreats go this one can be counted as a success. We had relaxing moments, tense moments, fun moments, learning moments and downright confusing moments....but like most trips or experiences you have with one another, you grow closer. And I believe that's exactly what team England did over our retreat....I believe its what we've been doing all year....so going on a journey like this together was incredible. There is nothing like experiencing new and amazing things with people who you can no longer imagine your life without. Maybe it seems a strange thought to you but that's what this trip really let me see and realize. This year has ensured to me that I will always view Kaihle and Rachel as friends...they will always be a part of my life......its like I always tell Rachel to make her roll her eyes 'best friends forever' (the eye rolling probably comes from the fact I usually sing it in a high pitched voice). I've learned some interesting things about myself during orientation and throughout the year in terms of my personality quirks and convictions. One of those things I learned is that people like me might not have tons of friends but those we do have...the ones we let get close and get close to in return...we don't let go. And I honestly can't think of two more amazing people to have gotten this close with. Experiencing Italy with two of my 'best friends forever' was a once in a lifetime kind of trip.....(or maybe not so once in a lifetime if our future plans work out hehe)....but I digress. The purpose of this post was actually meant to share with you what we did during our retreat, so let me get to that.

We traveled to Pisa, Italy the Saturday before Easter. We spent two days there experiencing all Pisa had to offer.....literally all Pisa had to offer. I suppose there is probably more to see and do than what we did....but we did the only things that most everyone chooses to see when they visit Pisa - the leaning tower and the Square of Miracles. There wasn't much else to see and do...plus the weather was not on our side....but we had a really fantastic time anyways. While in Pisa we had some seriously AMAZING pizza, took the expected leaning tower pictures that everyone groans at, listened to a woman sing a cord with herself in the baptistery, explored the beautiful cemetery with huge frescoes and attended the Archbishop's Easter mass. All in all we had a really great time together...bonding over strange 'hotels', gelato and art. Pisa was good.

Next we traveled by train to Florence. Florence was by far my favorite part of the trip...I believe it was probably everyone's favorite....we didn't even do that much but it was still wonderful because the atmosphere of Florence is an experience all its own. We spent 3 days in Florence with relatively nice weather. We did some pretty cool things while there. We climbed a very high hill to one of Europe's oldest churches. It was beautiful! Sculptures, frescoes, monks, crypts, the view......amazing! We looked out over Florence from Michelangelo's piazza, window shopped along Ponte Vecchio, explored the Uffizi museum, stood in awe of the Duomo, and climbed its famous Filippo Brunelleschi designed dome. We also spent a lot of time just wandering around the city and along the riverside...art, culture, history...what more can you ask for?

We then took a train to Rome....a city known world over for its history. For those of you that know me....you know I was in my element. I love history....all history....I like learning about past people, things, cultures, peculiarities, religions, traditions....all of it! Rome is historically incredible! We sat on the Spanish Steps, threw pennies into Trevi Fountain, saw Michelangelo's Pietà in St. Peter's basilica, stared in wonder at the Sistine Chapel ceiling, walked the ancient halls of the coliseum, wandered through the Roman Forum, and saw Raphael's grave in the Pantheon. We complained and moaned in harmonious accord as we experienced torrential downpours, soggy luggage, and hotels miles away from civilization. :)

 









 ...and ya know what? It was great! We learned what it meant for a place to inspire worship, what a masterpiece looks like, how a sculpture can radiated emotion, and what it felt like to walk in the same places people have been walking for thousands of years. We came back with so much new knowledge, so many shared feelings of delight and amazement, and so many hilarious stories that will continually be fun to recollect. Our retreat was everything a retreat should be, but the best part of all was probably when we all admitted we were ready to go home....and by home we meant Bradford with the people we have grown to love and respect. I now understand the idea that home can be a place.....but it can also be people. Retreat in Italy = Success.